Thank you Girl

How excited was I when I read Girl's blog yesterday? Soooooo excited. I've been reading her blog for some time now. She's one of my SIL, Amy's, online BFF's. This chick is awesome on so many levels. Forget the fact that she's an amazing photographer (I wish I lived in PA so she could teach me a few things), crafting extraordinaire and mother to three gorgeous kids - she's a great friend to Amy! I'm excited that Amy gets to finally meet her in a few weeks IRL.

Thanks Girl for including me in your 7. Between you and Amy, you covered all my 7!!!! Thanks for always writing great entries and sharing your world with the rest of the world.

Good Day???

Thursday came and went like a giant blur. Although I hadn't gotten any sleep in the previous few nights due to sick kids, I drug my tired butt to the hospital, for what I knew was going to be another crappy day on the floor. As I suspected... 6 patients, 4 of which were discharged and to be leaving before 12. There was another pending discharge, leaving me with one patient. This is NOT the way you want to start your day as a Medical/Surgical/Orthopedic RN - this was the making of a train wreck. The kind of day that makes you walk your ass off, pass pills like you are handing out candy, chase your tail, run around like crazy person, no eating/drinking/peeing, headache creating terrible day. On top of knowing you have a huge discharge list and all it's paperwork BS, you know (and fear) an evenly amounted admission list was heading your way. ACK... just thinking about it... I HATE MANAGEMENT... douche bag, pieces of shit. "We don't have the budget to hire more nurses." Yet they are building more stupid shit and remodeling more ugly/old stuff at the hospital. Idiots... they wonder why we all want to quit. Anyway... as I watched the clock getting closer to noon, my first person left. My next two were waiting for the surgeon to show and the 4th was being a pain in the ass. "I'm not leaving today because I don't have a ride home!". I loved my two ladies in the middle. Post-op lap banding. They required nothing from me. Both very funny, sweet, happy - the kind of people we rarely see on the floor. I got lots of hugs from them when they left at 1:15. My last lady left at 2:30. Thank god! My questionable 5th ended up getting nuts so we had to give her Haldol and tie her to the bed = no discharge. Surprisingly, I only had one admission heading my way. I guess it was a quiet day in the ER. She rolled up around 4:30 - 25 yr old ACL repair. She was awesome. In all my time of being a RN my day has never ended like Thursday did... EARLY! I was 100% done with 4 discharges, one admission, charting, noting, etc by 5:45. What do you do for an hour at the hospital??? I surfed the web, read some emails, chatted with friends at work. We (the other 3 nurses) all had great days. We got lots of laughs & jokes in too! I work with some outstanding people, most of whom have an outrageously twisted sense of humor. What started out to be a shitty day ended up being one of my best ever. I only wish we had more days like that.
We'll see what happens this Thursday when I go back. I'll keep my fingers crossed.

Day at school

Mrs. Cary (parapro)

Sydney & Sage


I went to school with Sydney on Wednesday. It was my day to volunteer in the classroom. As soon as we got there, she bolted to the playground and I went in the class to get my "assignment". Mrs. DeMarco had several to pick from . There's no surprise that there would be lots of cut/glue/tape/staple work. I was tasked with filling sheet protectors with the ABC's on one side, the child's name on the other. These were then to be placed in each kid's binder so that they could trace them at home for more practice. Project #2: sharpen a cup full on pencils. Project #3: cut out and assemble "The Five Fabulous Senses" books for each of the 50 kids she teaches. That sucked... very time consuming. Project #4: didn't get to it. My sanity was saved when I got to take groups of 5 back and forth to the nurse's office for ear/vision screening. That took about 1.5 hours. The only reason I didn't take the last group was because there was a "FD" - fire drill! How fun was that... those kids are pros! They have a "FD" each month to keep the process fresh in the kids head. They all lined up at the door very quietly, followed Mrs. DeMarco out of the room and across the parking lot. They stopped in a dirt area that backed up to some homes that are being built right next door. The school emptied in no time at all. From the time the alarm went off until the "all clear" came out, less than 5 minutes has passed. They were very quick and very efficient. I was very please and impressed at how well the faculty & staff cleared the buildings. They all marched back to class and picked up right where they left off. I couldn't believe how busy they actually are. It's non-stop learning. They even work during snack time. Coloring, writing, crafting, playing, reading, listening, etc... always doing something! I look forward to going back - it was so much fun!

Calendar/Letter Area

Food Update/Two more teeth

Ryan has his first jar of #3 food - turkey, rice & garden veggies! He loved it. He ate the how jar plus the entire container of banana & mixed berries. Teeth update: his top two teeth are out. Finally... they broke the gumline day on Friday. I'm counting the days until the next one comes.

He stands!!!

The Coolest Thing EVER

Since we live thousands of miles from any person we are related to, we all have a "Wish List" on Amazon.com. While looking at all the lists today to start getting them updated for Christmas, I happened upon this little treat! You can add something from ANYWHERE online to your Amazon list! It's the best thing ever. I can now put even more stuff on our lists. If you have an Amazon list, you've got to try this.

8

Little Ryan has been with us eight months now. He's done some pretty amazing things in these few short months. Now he's trying to walk. He stands briefly on his own and you can tell he's really thinking about what to do next. He's a curious little boy. Still crawling on hands & feet - he gets around just fine. There's not a place in the house he hasn't found his way to. His 6th tooth is on the verge of popping out any day now. As far as his diet... he like just about anything we give him. Still not happy with squash; makes him puke. He likes yogurt and Ritz crackers and has had Cherrios a few times. We are about to try the #3's this week. He eats, for the most part, two #2 containers for lunch and dinner. I've already given him rice, but he was not all that interested in it. I guess he didn't like the texture of it. He's getting the hang of the sippie cup, but would rather drink from a cup or my straw. He STILL wakes up around 4am for a bottle, but will go back to sleep until 6:30ish. He's taking two naps a day now. Still is a risk taker - standing in the bathtub, climbing in the dishwasher, pulling at the plants, opens the coffee table drawers/cabinets, bangs on everything (glass tables & sliding door are some of his favorite). He's been so much fun to be around. I can't believe we only have four months before he's one. Should be some exciting weeks ahead...

Sydney yesterday

We were supposed to have a 4th of July party, but didn't. This is what she would have worn at that party! She's really starting to look like Rick and his brother Brian now.

What's the Deal?

Can someone please explain to me why Ryan LOVES power cords? He has always loved chewing on them. He loves the vacuum cleaner & floor mop - thinks they are the coolest things ever, but really loves their cords. I guess it's a teething thing or he's just weird like that. He also has learned how to pull things out of the outlets. Guess we will need to get the covers that automatically close when something is not in them for the hall night lights. *sigh*

Dishwasher door... his favorite thing! Regardless of where he is, if you open the dishwasher, here he comes. He tries climbing in it, pulls the bottom drawer out, licks the water off the door, chews on the soap door. All truly disgusting or unsafe, yet he does it everyday. It doesn't matter how many times we move him, close the door, put him on the floor far away; he's coming back!

Pooping in another room... the last few times he's pooped, he's crawled to the other side of the house to either his room or the playroom to poop. I know kids do this all the time, but to start at such an early age?

He's all over the house now. He's found his independence - goes all over the house. We go looking for him on a regular basis. I love it though - he's exploring!

On a positive note - #6 tooth is on it's way! I can feel it just at the gum line, so I'm thinking it will pop through by the weekend. Poor kid. He's had a few rough weeks!

#5

Ryan's fifth tooth has broken the gum line. Bottom #3 is on it's way out! After close inspection he's got two more on the top that should be coming soon too. Poor kid...

Wednesday

While at work yesterday, I call home to check in on everyone. Rick told some wonderful news... picture day is coming on August 7th, "Great" I thought, that was until he told me the day. August 7th happens to be on a Thursday. As most of you know, I only work on Thursdays. HORROR!!!! Yeap, that's when he said "Umm, you might might want to switch days or call off that day. If not, our kid's school picture will look like crap.". Immediately I ran to the charge RN, told her the drama, we both got a good laugh and she gladly changed my work day.

Fast forward to right now...Sydney just walked up to me and said "Mommy can you work on Wednesdays?". When I asked why, she said "Picture day will be on Thursday and Daddy doesn't fix my hair pretty!". We all laughed again...

These are Sydney's "First Week" pictures - I'll let you figure out what day was Thursday! I gotta give him credit, he tried!

"Wii" Sleeping

The Boy...the latest news!

I finally got around to getting pictures of his top teeth/Chiclets. They are going to be huge, but cute.


He also decided to grab the bowl from me last night and feed himself his Apples & Chicken dinner. I guess he thought it was fun...made a mess, but I didn't care.

Wii Fit

My Wii Fit finally got here today. One word - HARD! I loved everything I did on it, but it is extremely involved. You must stay focused while on this little board. And man, does it do a good work out. I'm excited to start using it on my non-walk/RN days! We also got the game Wii Ski, so Sydney should have lots of fun on that. I'll try that out tomorrow.

How Cute??

I took this while following her to the bus stop this morning.

5"

That's what the rain gage had in it this afternoon when Rick dumped it out... Stupid Rain!

Love 'em, Hate 'em

GD Monsoons.....
Don't get me wrong, I love storms! I love all the stuff that goes along with storms (rain, wind, lightening, thunder) - love it all. I love when we get a good rain, but I could have been spared last night .
I swear the rain we got last night was the worst one in a long time. Forget the hours, literally, of horrible lightening and thunder that kept Sydney awake until after 10:30, but the RAIN!!! Damn, there was a lot of rain. And on top of it all, yeap, the power kept going off & on for about 30 minutes. I hate the sounds of stuff coming back to life all at once!
I got up early for some bizarre reason to find a small pond in our backyard by her swing set. Both of the drains that bring the water from the backyard/wall of rocks to the road were flowing like little streams. Part of the front yard was washed into the road, part of our side yard was washed into the neighbor's. I cleaned out gobs of rocks and debris from the drain and the pond went down only a little in an hour.
I'm sure Rick had an exceptionally interesting night at work - flooding streets, stupid drivers, down power lines, flowing washes - all on top of the already crazy streets of East Tucson. I can only guess how he'll have to navigate around the rocks, boulders, mud & water sitting on the streets during his way back to us.
The only good thing to come of all this rain - weeds come out extra easy & we have A LOT of weeds right now.

WILD BOY

He is completely out of control...

Forget the fact that everything he touches goes in his mouth, but he is determined to kill himself! He MUST stand/kneel/crawl in the tub - the entire time in there. That's if he's not splashing like crazy!

Big Day for the Little Girl

We are all awake and waiting! In less than an hour, we leave to bring Sydney to her first day of Kindergarten. She's very anxious and excited. I'm wishing I didn't have to get up so early, but happy to do it. Rick is sad - he's not ready for her to go! Ryan... still sleeping.

The Kids

Staycations rock!

We got home earlier today from a 5 day staycation. Rick & I were house sitting for some friends who were visiting their son/DIL in Annapolis. After packing nearly everything you can imagine, I drove the kids up to the house on Friday. Not that I had to go far - 30 minutes north to the Catalina Mountain Foothills. I got us all settled in and set up a few things that I would need during the night. The kids acclimated quickly to their new "home". Sydney's been going there since she was a baby, so she was right at home. Ryan had to learn his way around the kitchen/living room, but like everything else he does, that didn't take long.
Saturday morning came bright and early... waffles for "beckfast" for the girl, while the boy made himself a little before breakfast snack.

This was the first of MANY attacks of the potted plants. This poor plant was moved into the laundry room. He found a few others the following day. He had lots of opportunities to stand at things, pull himself up & over things, pull things down, chew on things... boy stuff. His two top teeth are coming threw already. They started to break the gum line yesterday. Gums are swollen and very red but you can see them poking out a little. Sydney loved being at this house. There are lots of "things" for her to play with. Lots of crafty stuff: loads of crayons, markers, highlighters, paper, gadgets & gizmo's, stuffed animals & a giant can of LEGOs. We watched Evan Almighty Saturday morning, so she thought it would be cool to build "Noah's Art".

We got to do lots of swimming while there. Sydney has been getting more comfortable being in the water now that we've gotten her a life jacket. Only a few weeks ago, she was not going out into the pool - would only stay on the steps or attached to a person, even in her jacket. She now goes out on her own. Paddling her little feet and arms she can maneuver all over the pool. We are so very proud of her accomplishment! Ryan was trying to pull himself out of his little boat thing. Water going up his little nose didn't even seem to bother him.

As always, monsoon season is in full swing here. We got our late afternoon rain everyday. Some days we got an early afternoon, late afternoon & nighttime rain. Lots & lots of rain, but it never changed the temp. of the pool. Stayed between 86-88 degrees. Made for great looking skies and beautiful post-rain scenery. I've always been fond of the desert after a long cleansing rain.

Back home and back to life as we know it! We had such a relaxing, quiet few days away. The phone never rang, didn't have to get out of PJ's, didn't have to worry about doing housework, only left the house once - had to make a mall/Target/Toys R Us run. Soooooooo nice... We were glad to be gone, but glad to be home! Our thanks to the Delgado's for letting us hang out poolside for all those great days! Look forward to doing it again.

Happy SEVEN Months!

Today Ryan turns 7 months old. WOW - time certainly has flown by. That means it's been 4 months since I've been back to work, 2 months since he started getting teeth & crawling, 1 months since he started to stand next to things. I think it's the beginning of a new period for him. He's determined to walk & I am fairly certain that will happen in the next 2 months. He's got more teeth coming. In his "big seat" in the car. Eating like a champ. Needs to have the crib mattress lowered again - he likes to shake the rail while standing up in the crib.The best news to report... sleeping! He went to sleep last night at 8:30, made a few peeps throughout the night, and is still asleep (6am). I'm so happy for him. He's growing up so fast. I've loved every minute of it.

Firsts

Ryan has had a few "firsts" this week...swimming, big carseat & wearing Robeez shoes. All very successful events!

It!!!

My SIL Sarah tagged me, so it's my turn for this...

Ten Years Ago:
I started design school in Houston. Got my first apartment and started my adult life all on my own. It was scary living in a city of 3+ million people and not knowing a soul other than my two uncles, both of which I had a nonexistent relationship with.

Five Things on the To-Do List:

1. Laundry
2. Dishes
3. Clean up baby vomit all day
4. Vacuum & mop floors
5. Dinner

Snacks I enjoy:
Cake - plain yellow with chocolate icing, pretzels, popcorn, Salt & Vinegar chips, sweet tarts

Places I've Lived:

• Ama, LA
• Hammond, LA
• Houston, TX
• Tucson/Vail, AZ

Things I would do if I were a Millionaire:
Depending on if it's 1 million or multimillion...

1 Million:
$$$ in the kids Smith Barney accounts for college
Buy a new house
Get a "mom car" = minivan

Multimillion:
Same as above, BUT
Get out of Tucson quick, fast & in a hurry
New house would be in Arkansas on 30 acres on Crow Mountain
Give Amy & Chris enough $$$ to buy a fabulous home so that Carter could run wild and enough so that she could be a SAHM as long as she wanted!!! (If they wanted it, of course.)
Travel the world at some point
Give all the nieces/nephews some cash for college - the whole dozen
Get Rick his dream RV & a gas card
Send my Dad on a guided big-game hunt anywhere he wanted
Send Mom on a 6 month trip around the world

Stan the Man is BACK!!!

After the crappiest day ever at work Thursday, I got home and did my usual stuff - stripe fonky hospital clothes off, tell the family HI, make a bowl of Cheerios and hop online. The BEST ever email was waiting for my in my inbox. My heart soared and my smile couldn't have been bigger. It was from my friend Stan. I met Stan many years ago while going to Design School in Houston. He was this strange guy from Indonesia, but he quickly became one of my dearest friends. After graduating from school I began my career in Houston with a Top 10 firm in town and he moved back home. We tried staying in touch via email, but over the years and several "inactive account" on his end, we lost track of each other. You can imagine the terror I felt when his country was hit by the horrible Tsunami a few years ago. I cried for hours - I just knew he was gone & I would never be able to speak to him again. Rick, being the fabulous guy he is, bought me an international calling card for Valentine's Day with a note that said "I could get you nothing that would mean more than your peace of mind. Call him!" After crying more I got the courage to do just that! I dialed the gazillion digits it takes for an international call and prayed. I was freaked when a woman on the other end answered - I still to this day have no idea who she was, but in the several minutes of "talking" to her, I got that Stan was home and was sleeping. I couldn't have been happier except to get a random phone call on New Years for the punk. He was hung over from celebrating and called me just to say HI. We talked only briefly, but again it made me happy! I've always thought about Mr. Stan, the Monkeyman, from the island country that is home to the "Orange Man" orangutan. I always wondered if he was OK. How was his family - his two other brothers, parents, grandparents and puppy Besnie. How was his health? What was he up to? Much to my shock & surprise he's now married and has a daughter named Gail. I hope this is the beginning of a long time of communication between us - I miss him terribly and our friendship even more. He is a wonderful person. Very kind and extremely funny. We (my family & I) were so happy to have him in our lives. I hope one day to see him and his family again. Until then, I hope to do it through lots of pictures!

Beautiful

I love this girl...

Old picture of my baby girl

Found this online just now...

OMG!!!

I just now went into Ryan's room to get him from his nap. Thought I'd see him sitting up, smiling at me with his arms up in the air, like he's been doing for some time now. Much to my surprise, there he was STANDING at the rail with a smile on his face. This kid is amazing me every day. He's becoming an explorer - wants to see what's out there and what he can do. Lord only knows what he'll do next!

My Other Loves

My sister's children: Allie, Braden & Peyton

We are alone again...

I went outside yesterday to get a few more shots of our hummingbirds - they were gone. Not only were the birds gone, but most of the nest was destroyed. I searched all over the ground to see if the little guys had gotten blown out of the nest. Nope... not there. I think it was their time to fly away. Oh well! Will keep my eyes open for the next time.

The beauty of it all -

As Ryan finishes his round of taste-testing (he's tried every single ingredient food, except prunes), I rearranged the cabinet this morning so that he wouldn't be getting the same dish two days in a row. I love how the veggies are so colorful. Fruits... suck! I can't wait to start him on the rest of the yummy varieties of baby food next month. I know he will love all the mixed fruits and then there are the ever so tasty dinners - yummy!! We got him the puffy things today - one can of fruit, one can of veggies. He's had them before, but I figured I'd keep them around the house now for snacks.

What???

How does this happen???

They say this is who he looks like -

This is my dad - a few years ago. We all think Ryan looks like him.
What do you think?

Sleeping Beauty

I love when they fall asleep in crazy places or positions. Sydney is known for this... it's all new to Ryan!!

Ryan news

So...
This kid has been keeping me on my toes, literally at times. In the past few weeks he's been a busy boy - learning how to do a lot of fun things. He's pretty much got the crawling thing mastered. He's now pulling himself up on things. Just the other night it was the dishwasher door. It seems like his favorite thing is my pant legs - no big deal, unless he's doing it while I'm trying to cook or walk. He now climbs under his activity thing. He thinks it's really fun to lay on the platform. He did a face plant onto the tile last night as he was coming out of it. Oh well... He's now going "free" in the tub, no sponge, not mat. Crawling around is a fun thing and he's tried several times to bite the drain thing, but didn't like all the water that went up his nose. Oh well... I have to be very careful now while he's in his Bumbo - he almost pulled himself off the chair yesterday while watching Sydney color. Several weeks ago he decided to dive off our bed and onto the floor. Didn't really seem to bother him, but it kinda freaked me out. Rick & I were both watching him - little booger is FAST! I guess he's getting me/us prepared for all the ER visits that he'll be making. I just chalk it up to him being a boy. Oh well... I love it! He's eating well. He gets 3 tbsp. of oatmeal in the AM with a little grape juice & water mixed in. For dinner, he get one whole #2 fruit or vegetable with 1 tbsp. rice cereal mixed in. Gobbles everything down in no time. Still wakes up at least once for a bottle at night; usually around 4:00. I have to go in a a couple times to find hid bink for him, but other than that, he's doing well at night. I hate that he wakes up early - anywhere from 4:30-7, but usually 6ish. Looks like we will be moving him to a bigger carseat any day now. There is no more room in the straps for him anymore and his heals are at the end of the seat! I'm glad in a way - he's heavy in that thing. It's a good thing that he can sit up in the shopping carts! More to come I'm sure...

Birds

Took this today...they are starting to get feathers.

Happy Father's Day!!

On this special day, I wanted to honor all the dad's out there, especially mine and Rick. They are two of the three most important and most loved men in my life. I'm so lucky to have such an amazing father, as are my children. Rick has been a remarkable husband to me, but has been the best father to our two kids; they love him so very much. I only hope Ryan grows up to be as good a man as they are. My dad and Rick are two extraordinary role models. I love you both. Happy Father's Day!!!

Our Babies

Now keep in mind, these things are TINY! If I had to guess the head size is about the size of a jelly belly jellybean.

With a sad heart, be at peace Ofc. Hite

The events of yesterday have been in the works for a week now. Last weekend, Officer Erik Hite was killed in the streets of Tucson, while in pursuit of a lunatic. Yesterday we, as a community, buried this fine man.

My story is like many - I'm the wife of a fellow TPD officer, one of Erik's co-workers and brothers/sisters in uniform. I had my "supportive wife" hat on. I was just one of many there with our spouse to pay our respect to this man and his family. It's a hat I pray never to wear again. Although yesterday was unbelievably, overwhelmingly sad, it had so many shining moments. Moments that left me speechless and humbled. My day started out with a mad dash to Code 14 (Eastside Police Substation). I had to meet Rick there by 8:30 since he worked Monday night, got off at 7am, and didn't come home. We left for the church so that his patrol car could be in position for the procession to the cemetery. On a typical day, this drive would have only taken a few minutes - it took almost 20. The traffic was really congested - police & motor units from near and far were all making their way to Pantano Christian Church at the same time. As we got to the church it looked like the parking lot of a major sporting event, only that the cars were vehicles from police, fire, DPS, Air Force, sheriff, Border Patrol, airport, US Forest Service, Homeland Security... the list could go on. I was shocked. Where we had to park looked like a sea of black & whites. Only TPD units...and it looked like every car that wasn't on patrol was there. As far as you could see, there were TPD cars, SUVs, or specialty vehicles. That should have prepared me for what was to come.

The Church: 10:00 start time
Nearly 3000, yes thousand, people sat inside this church. There was a beautiful mix of blue, black, green, grey, beige - all mixed together as officers sat next to each other regardless of branch or rank. This doesn't include the hundreds of officers that where outside for honor guard, traffic detail, etc. The was a low hum of conversation that was occurring for the 30 minutes + we waited. As the motor units pulled into the driveway and past the glass entry doors of the church, the room almost immediately went silent. You could have heard a mouse squeak it was so quite. No movement, no words - just stillness. As Officer Hite was brought into the church he was lead by his 19 year old son Roy & Roy's wife Katie, both in their Air Force dress uniform. A flag draped casket was flanked by several TPD officers, airmen and two of Erik's friends from other agencies. His widow, Nohemy, visibly upset and overwhelmed, was helped to her seat by the two officers holding her up on her feet. Following Nohemy, was a tiny little girl in the arms of a woman. A, just by a few days, one year old dressed in her Sunday best. This was Officer Hite's daughter Samantha. Several other family members were in line behind them. After everyone was seated, the ceremony began. It was amazing. From the dozen (if I counted right) speakers, we were all shown to the wonders of this great man. He was brave, honest, dependable, trusting, motivating, spiritual, inspirational, kind, generous, loving...everything that makes the best man you can imagine. These people were involved in his life in various forms stood in front of us, trying so hard to maintain composure - be a strong man and not cry, spoke so lovingly about Erik. His son, Roy, was the only one of them that handled it like the strongest of men. What I can only imagine as the most difficult thing ever, called his Dad his best friend and hero. It was the most impressive few minutes of this whole day. Not a pause, not a tear, not a struggle - he just did it!!! We saw two video tributes to Erik. Both full of images that made us all smile. These were images of his life. Images with his family, children, wife, friends and co-workers, his prized "Old Blue" and his Harley. Several of his favorite songs were sung and his favorite scripture passages read. There was the "police business" done - different items presented to Nohemy and the family by several different people of position. After two hours of church service, it was time to head to the cemetery. Imagine the time it takes to get 3000 people into cars and wait. This was the time for TPD and the city to shine. This was what it was all about...showing the family that we all cared.

The Cemetery: en route at 12:35
First, let it be known that I've never seen anything remotely close to this. I can't count how many funerals I've been to, some of which had a military ceremony at graveside. This was unlike anything I think most have seen. As you may have noticed from slide show link above, there were a lot of motorcycles - nearly 200 of them at the beginning of the procession. Our position in the motorcade was about 1.5 miles behind the family and 8.5 miles in front of the last car. Yes - over 10 MILES of cars, single file. We were getting the traffic report from "Air1" over the police radio. I never thought being in the back of a police car would be such an emotionally difficult experience. Words can't describe the feelings that I had while driving through the city. The streets were lined with people - of all age & race. Flags were being flown, hands over hearts, tears flowing, salutes - you name it. Everywhere you looked, there were people. Every single street out of neighborhoods, both sides of the road, every intersection had at least one police person/car, some had two. All the major intersections had fire trucks, more police and even more people. So many people... it made me cry more than once. All I kept thinking was "God, I hope this never happens to me. How do you explain this to a child? This is amazing. I can't believe what I'm seeing!"

The Cemetery: arrival @ 1something
As we pulled into the cemetery there were more people, flags, police cars, more everything just now, it was all contained in one tight space. There were tents set up all over the place. It is summer here and we were lucky to have 104 degree day with a dry, hot, dirt filled breeze. It sucked! We were separated from our spouses - they went where the cops went and we went under a tent next to them. There was a huge group of officers from other agencies making up an honor guard, a group of Air Force, 7 additional airmen for the 21 gun salute, 2 buglers, the bagpipers, a dozen or so mounted patrol (horses), American Legion people, and lots of other "people". As the casket was take out of the hearse and brought over to the site, the bagpipers began "Amazing Grace" and my heart broke. That song, no matter where I am, will make me cry. I think it's because of all the funerals I've been to. It's a standard in any Catholic funeral mass, so I've always heard it under sad circumstances. Typical military service...lots of saluting, lots of order & properness. As you can imagine, the 21 gun salute was heartwrenching. Taps was played, cry cry cry...I REALLY hate that part. I kept thinking about Rick. He'd never been to a funeral that wasn't for a Jewish person and never one of military service. He didn't have any point of reference for the emotions that were thrust upon him during all this. It was so strange, so out of his comfort zone. I couldn't see him in the rows of TPD officers, but I knew he was not alone. He was surrounded by people all feeling the same thing he did. A group of helicopters flew over head in formation. As Chief Miranda present Nohemy with Erik's flag, even from as far as we were standing, you could hear her sob, crying out "No". Cry, cry, cry even more. A friend of ours was standing in front of me, and as I grabbed Gwen's shoulder, I prayed that we never be in Nohemy's shoes. After the casket was lowered into the earth, it was very quite outside. A high pitched sound went off. The emergency tone was sounded... this was the part I knew Rick would not take well. This was the last time Erik's designator would be called out - "Four-Adam-three-seven" "Four-Adam-three-seven" "Four-Adam-three-seven"... cry, cry, cry. You could see that this hit home with every single one of the TPD officers, most of whom had their heads down and tears in their eyes. It was very well said - he will not be forgotten, ever. As doves were released into our beautiful blue sky, the bagpiper played "Danny Boy" and the service ended. The Hite family gathered around the graveside and said their final goodbyes to Erik. His poor wife was literally carried to the limousine by one of Erik's academy classmates and dear friend. That poor woman has been through so much - I think yesterday it all came to head. She is an amazing woman - so strong for so many. Cry, cry, cry...
We left the cemetery near 2:30. Rick had now been awake for over 24 hours and was physically & emotionally exhausted. Finally got home sometime near 3:30. He went straight to bed and I sat around with the kids. My mom hat was put on again. Everyone was in bed and fast asleep at 7:45, so I took three ibuprofen and crawled my sunburned, aching, bloodshot eyed, exhausted body into bed. I said one last prayer for the Hite family and went to sleep.
My heart is filled with so many emotions right now. My head full of confusion. All the how's and why's and what-if's...Time heals all!

I prayer that, in time, Nohemy and her family will heal from this horrific tragedy. I pray that her soul will mend and she is given a new hope in life. One day, she will smile and be happy again.

To all those brave men and women that wear the badge - be safe, be smart and watch out for each other. You have the support of me, this family and the citizens of Tucson.

Officer Hite... Rest in peace with the Lord. Know that you will not be forgotten and know that your family has a community and your TPD family standing by their side. I look forward to meeting you one day - you are one in a million.

In fact, two...

I have seen the other hummingbird baby!!!! It stuck it's tiny little head out the other side of the nest. I'll try to get pictures tomorrow.

HOW AMAZING!!!

I've been spying on our "little" neighbors. I had a feeling there was a new addition, but I couldn't look in the nest to find out for sure. I waited outside this morning to see if any action was going on up there - to my extreme surprise, I got a peek at a very tiny little head poking out of the nest. I still don't know how many eggs/babies are up there, I only saw this one.

6 month Pictures

Here are a few of the many pictures we got of him last week.

A Rainbow of Colors

I LOVE the surprises of baby food poops. You never really know what texture, color or consistency they will be until you open the diaper. This morning was an extremely colorful morning - one that would make Jackson Pollack proud. Having eaten carrots and peas over the last two days Ryan produced a beauty. With several hues of oranges and a few of green mixed in, I found a soft, patty of poop this morning that made me take a second look. I must admit, it was rather well done. The colors swirled together nicely & the irregular texture added a bit more visual interest. I'm anxious to see what happens tomorrow morning.

There's No Stopping Him Now

Forget that he's been sitting unsupported for weeks now, Ryan can now sit himself up from a lying position. He's so happy with his accomplishment - once he crawls (getting better each day) to the objects he wants to play with, he gets himself to a seated position & starts to play!! Independence here he comes...

Rest

We watched as you pinned on your badge for the very first time.
You had trained and studied; learning what was needed to do the job
you would be called upon to do.
How you proudly stood at attention, saluting and repeating the oath,
vowing to give your all and do your best.
But now, shifts over...
lie down and rest.

You left early in the morn, while we slept snug and warm
Just as often you returned in late even'tide when,
long before, we had retired.
You sacrificed your rest and time that we could live and laugh
work and play, knowing we were safe, vowing to give your all and do your best.
But now, shifts over...
lie down and rest.

When we called you answered, whether friend or foe, neighbor or stranger.
You risked life and limb, comfort and safety, always to ensure that we
enjoyed home and workplace, recreation and employment.
You gave of yourself dutifully to the searching faces and pleading hands
reaching to you for help; responding quickly to the slightest call,
vowing to give your all and do your best.
But now, shifts over...
lie down and rest.

Now we stand, sad and somber, quietly listening to Tap's final song.
You answered the call and gave your all as you responded to the last bell of Destiny's alarm.
One last time you pinned on your badge and honored your oath;
seeing nameless faces and unknown grasping hands
You kept your vow, you gave your all, you did your very best.
But now, shifts over...
lie down and rest.

Two for the Kids

My daddy is a policeman, he wears a suit of blue;
he didn't come home from work last night,
mommy says he's in heaven with you.

I'm worried about my daddy Lord,
he's never been away this long before;
mommy cried when she told me we
that wouldn't see daddy no more.

I don't know what it was
that mommy was trying to explain;
she said the police were after a bad man,
and somehow my daddy was slain.

Now I don't know what that means Lord,
all I know is we miss daddy a lot;
because tomorrow is my birthday,
and I sure hope he hasn't forgot.

Lord if my daddy is up there in heaven,
please tell him as soon as he is free;
to hurry back home as fast as he can,
because we miss him, mommy and me.

Thank you God, Amen

That man in blue,
The hero to those in need,
The enemy to those who were doing wrong.
You were the one to call when things were bad,
You were a wonderful Son, Husband, Father, Friend.
You were always there when someone needed you.
The strong one in times of trouble
The shoulder that you could cry on
The one that you could count on.
You were someone special to everyone,
And every life you touched.

But to me...
You were Just Daddy!

Be Blessed

"Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the sons of God." Matthew 5:9

Final Inspection

The Final Inspection

The policeman stood and faced his God,
Which must always come to pass.
He hoped his shoes were shining.
Just as brightly as his brass.

"Step forward now, policeman.
How shall I deal with you?
Have you always turned the other cheek?
To My church have you been true?"

The policeman squared his shoulders and said,
"No, Lord, I guess I ain't,
Because those of us who carry badges
can't always be a saint.

I've had to work most Sundays,
and at times my talk was rough,
and sometimes I've been violent,
Because the streets are awfully tough.

But I never took a penny,
That wasn't mine to keep....
Though I worked a lot of overtime
When the bills got just too steep.

And I never passed a cry for help,
Though at times I shook with fear.
And sometimes, God forgive me,
I've wept unmanly tears.

I know I don't deserve a place
Among the people here.
They never wanted me around
Except to calm their fear.

If you've a place for me here, Lord,
It needn't be so grand.
I never expected or had too much,
But if you don't.....I'll understand.

There was silence all around the throne
Where the saints had often trod.
As the policeman waited quietly,
For the judgement of his God.

"Step forward now, policeman,
You've borne your burdens well.
Come walk a beat on Heaven's streets,
You've done your time in hell."

Our Greatest Fear

I've been reading the pages of reflections that have been left for Officer Erik Hite. All extremely moving, sincere and very heartfelt. Over the last several days, I've seen so many poem/quotes/stories that I've decided to post several of them over the next few days. This one is one of my favorites.

Our Greatest Fear

Yet once again the Thin Blue Line is diminished,
an officer's final tour of duty is finished.
"Officer down", it's our greatest fear,
and once again, I hold back a tear.
They patrol in the state, city, county and town,
in uniforms colored white, green, blue and brown.
The shape of their badges may vary,
but it's a symbol that they all, proudly carry.
They leave for work with a kiss goodbye,
but some don't come home, no matter how hard they try.
To uphold the law is the job that they pick,
with such high aspirations, why must some die so quick?
They leave behind loved ones, family and friends,
after their lives have met tragic ends.
Some die in crashes, others hearts not too stout,
to many have been lost when gunshots ring out.
Our Heavenly Father has called them home,
no more these dark streets do they roam.
Through trial and error they have given their best,
please Lord, now grant them eternal rest.
Yet once again the Thin Blue Line is diminished,
an officer's final tour of duty is finished.
"Officer down", it's our greatest fear,
and once again I hold back a tear.

-Unknown Author

Huge Hit

Carrots... he woofed the entire size 2 container in a matter of minutes. Loved ever single bite - plus, he blew carrot/spit bubbles too!

"Far Exceeds Typical"

That's what Dr. Auerbach said when he saw Ryan going all over the exam table today. I almost had to put him on the floor - he was trying to climb in his carseat, pull the BP machine off the wall, constantly flipping himself over, crumbling the table paper... just wild! He's doing "exceptionally" well in everything. He was very pleased at how well Ryan can sit, crawl, pull himself up, etc. He's weighing in at 19 pounds 2 ounces (75%), 27 3/4" long (90%) and his head is 44cm (50%). Sydney didn't much like the idea of him getting more shots today, but like always, he took them like a champ! He can now have 2-3 meals a day, still adding one new food a week. So far he's had rice & oatmeal cereals, green beans, squash, pears and bananas. I've been giving him cereal around 9:30 and his veggie/fruit around 5:30pm. Next on the menu tonight I think will be carrots. He still wakes up a few times a night for whatever reason, but I've been trying get him back to sleep without feeding him. That seems to be working OK. Last night I finally had to get him up to feed him around 4:30 for a bottle - it had been over 8 hours since he had one. He was up a few times before that, but managed to get himself back to sleep on his own. Wahoo... He may make his first pool appearance tomorrow or over the weekend. It's been so hot here that our friends pool is in the high 80's or low 90's - all well over the recommended 85 degrees. We'll see...
On a side note - I had his pictures taken today! So many great poses... nearly 30 in all! I'll post my favorites as soon as I get them via email.

Being the Wife of One

Five years and 6 days ago, Tucson lost a fine Police Officer to violence. At 12:10 today, I got a phone call from Larry Lopez, President of TPOA (Tucson Police Officer's Association). I consider him a dear friend, not just a guy Rick works with. Almost instantly I could tell something was wrong by the tone in his voice. As he asked if Rick was still sleeping, he sounded terrified. That's when I knew - there was an officer involved shooting. Immediately I went to our room and woke Rick up... "You need to wake up and really wake up. Larry's on the phone and needs to talk to you". He shot up in bed and said "Oh shit! I'm on my way!" An officer had indeed been involved in a shooting and it didn't look good for him. As he bolted out the front door and I jumped on the internet. The articles and pictures were not good. Being a RN, I knew one thing, but the wife of a Police Officer, I prayed for something else. I could only imagine what it would feel like if it were Rick in that situation. If it was him that was getting flown to our trauma center because of the actions of some piece of shit, some selfish asshole, some walking waste of human-being. As the wife of an officer, you are used to hearing this, seeing this, going through this type of thing. I've never had a problem with his job. I've always known that there is an inherent risk he takes every night he puts on his uniform. I'm OK with those risks... it's his job. Like he always says, "they don't pay me for what I do, they pay me for what I might have to do." I'm glad he's out there taking those risk for me and the rest of the good citizens of Tucson. I've never lost sleep because of what he does. I'm not scared for him nor am I ever worried about him. I tell him "Have a good night, love you & see you in the am" every time he walks out the door. Unfortunately, there may come a day when I may get the knock on the door or the early am phone call. It's part of the package - not that I like the idea of it all, but that's the package I got when I said "yes". I pray that day never comes. Not for myself, but for our kids. I'd be OK in time, but they would have a void for the rest of their lives.

This officer, with the shattered shell of his wife at his side, being kept alive on drugs and machines until his parents and son can arrive, did nothing to deserve this. His family did not wake up this morning only to go to sleep knowing its without him in their lives. His wife didn't sign up for raising a daughter, who turns ONE on Wednesday, without a father. I'm sure his son thought he'd have a lifetime to make his father proud of his military career. This is the stuff that makes me so angry about the situation. What this piece of shit did to this family - no justice will ever make up for it! I know more information will come out over the next several days - it won't change the outcome. Regardless of what is known, it won't change the fact that a good man was gunned down in the street today leaving so many behind.

Rick got home near 5:15 this afternoon. Visible shaken, near tears and had a look of exhaustion and worry. A look that I've never seen. I think today has made him realize that this could have been him or any of his guys, and that didn't sit well. He's a very strong man, but today, he was not. Today he was one of 800+ that had a friend, a comrade, a fellow officer, taken from them in a very brutal, violent & intentionally horrific manner. He provided support to the officers on duty today and will continue to do that until he gets home from his shift, only to do it again tomorrow. He loves his job - good & bad!

He did great things for this officer's family - one of which was to get his parents here from Oregon. But, thanks to the airlines, these poor people are now stranded in Portland. The plane that was to fly them here had mechanical problems and had to be diverted. Nothing was leaving Portland after they landed. Not even to Phoenix. How terrible is that? Now they have to sit in a cold, lonely hotel over night knowing that their son is dying in an ICU room in Tucson and there is nothing they can do but cry for him. They will not make it here in time to tell him goodbye - that's a travesty!!!

The next time you see an officer, whether he's writing your speeding ticket, or passing you on the street - thank him/her. They wear the uniform for us, for our safety, for our freedoms. They wear it because they want to. Some die on our streets everyday doing a job that is always under appreciated and hated by so many. Where is the justice in that? Support your local police department in anyway you can. Let them know you care about the officer's that put on the badge and risk it all every shift.

My thanks and appreciation go out to all those officers on the street today. They are all working under extremely stressful conditions tonight. They've lost enough today...

Be safe! Be smart! Watch out for each other!